Sunday, June 21, 2009

Father's Day

Mother's Day seems to get more play than Father's Day. I don't know why. My children's father is a huge part of their lives. I'm very glad he gets the opportunity to be with them so much. It wasn't always that way for families in the more recent past. Further in the past, fathers probably originally had a larger role in their children's lives.

When fathers worked on the farm, alongside their wives and children, the family dynamic was close, for better or worse. I am sure fathers had a greater impact on their sons and daughters as they grew up. Then factories and businesses moved out of the family home and vicinity and fathers left the household for several hours, spending much less time with their family. Eventually, we ended up with something similar to the generalization of the 1950s, with dads coming home from work, greeted by kids and wife, eating dinner, then going somewhere to do "dad" things while the mother put the children to bed.

Occasionally, one hears stories about how people wish their dads had been more involved in their lives. The way society has evolved made dads spending a lot of time with children much less the norm. I am hoping that my generation and beyond, the guys growing up will want to spend more time with their kids. I am hoping my children have a great example with their own dad and can pass that on to their children. That my son will not be afraid to take a break from his career to stay home with the kids. Or that both my children can work at their home with their spouses. A return to the families of the early United States, where everyone worked together in the home.

But this post was to be a tribute to my husband. I am so proud of him and everything he does for our home and family. I don't think I say it enough. He puts up with conversations with people nearly 30 years younger every day and shows genuine interest. He plans and cooks meals that we sit down together for and enjoy. The laundry is endless, yet I really don't hear him complain about it. I think he likes doing laundry. Often when I come home, the kids are outside and he's entertaining our son with throwing a football or playing basketball, because our son doesn't have any neighbors his own age. He sweeps the floor nearly every day, and is tinkering, doing random landscaping, or mowing. I know the household would not run quite as smoothly if I were doing all this.

He is a good man: solid, practical, charming, sweet, playful, funny. I have friends who have husbands who maybe aren't quite so neat and tidy or maybe don't help as much as he does around the house. I find myself very glad that I snagged him. Even before we were one income, he did a lot of the house work anyway. We were friends before we started dating. His genuine concern for me as a friend grew into so much more. He is a good father to our children, enjoying the things they enjoy, teasing and playing, giving hugs and cuddles. It is great to see his face light up when our daughter wants him for hugs and kisses. He is the solid rock that I come home to every night. When I am stressed about work, the refuge of my home is one of the ways I can de-stress and become calm again. It is something I deeply appreciate and love to come home to everyday.

Happy Father's Day!


Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Here's to the good men. Beautiful tribute.

Aliceson said...

You are one lucky lady, not just because your husband cooks and cleans but because he enjoys being the home parent. As much as my husband says he would love to be a SAHD, I think it would be tough for him. Not everyone is cut out for it, but it sounds like you guys have it dialed in.